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Top 10 tips for making friends in new places


  1. Examine the reason that you're in the new place. Have you come for a job? For a degree? If so, try and meet new friends there, it's a built-in community for you already, make use of it! Have you come because you wanted simply to live in that place? Go on a walking tour. Tour guides tend to be very knowledgeable about the best places in town (and also can tell you some cool historical trivia). Or hit up a museum's tour, you can meet people there as well.
  2. Don't be afraid to suggest events yourself. Once you've met some people, you might find that no one is suggesting anything to do. Asking if anyone wants to get coffee is completely normal and, chances are, someone else is feeling like they could use a friend. Are other people suggesting events you'd rather not go to? Suggest ones you would like. You may find that a bunch of people like going on hikes when that sounds like utter death to you. Fear not, plenty of those people are still up for going to a movie or getting a drink if you just make the suggestion. No one (contrary to what your brain might tell you) is going to think you're weird for suggesting a fun time.
  3. Explore the city and find some favorite haunts. Now exploring a new city is hopefully already on your agenda if you've just moved, but if not, put it on there ASAP. Every city has some fun stuff to do. Check out the local coffee shops. Which has the best mocha? Which has the best WiFi? Which has the best hours? Which has the best pastries? Find your favorite place and become a regular. Eventually you'll end up chatting with the staff there and can maybe even make new friends. But even if they're not best friends, it can be nice to go somewhere where people know your name and will smile and say hello. Plus, it will give you a place to suggest for an outing should you be planning one (and you should be).
  4. See what's on at local libraries or colleges. Many libraries and colleges will have lectures or readings or other such events that are open to the public (and often free). Go check them out and you're bound to find like minded people to strike up a conversation with.
  5. Now you may also want to consider dating apps. Some (like Bumble I believe) even have an option for looking for a friend connection. Or you may find yourself on a date with someone that may not be your one true love, but could be a great friend. This may not be the best idea for everyone, but you can usually end up having at least one nice conversation.
  6. Don't be afraid to tap into an online community that you already have. Are you a fan of a podcast? There may be an online forum for fans in your area. Generally, people tend to be pretty responsive to a "Hey, I'm a fan of ___ and I just moved to ___. Anyone fancy a drink?" You'll meet people that you know you have at least one, but probably more, thing in common with.
  7. If you were a member of a group or club where you lived before, find out if there's a local chapter. More and more groups and clubs are going international these days, so there may be a local chapter in your new home. Or, failing that, see if anyone from your old group knows anyone in your new area. Could be your photography group doesn't have a local chapter nearby, but someone in your old group knows of a similar club that is nearby.
  8. On a similar note to #7, find out if anyone you already know has a friend in the area. This won't always work, but chances are someone you know knows someone not far from you (the world is smaller than you think). If you're friends with good people (and I hope you are), they'll get you in touch and then you at least have a guide for your new hometown.
  9. If you can, take a class. It doesn't much matter in what as long as you're interested in it. Having a mutual activity to do is an easy way to make friends. Also, chances are there is something your new hometown is known for that you could learn. Maybe they have a specific style of dance? Sign up for a class and meet some other newbies.
  10. Find a place to volunteer. Did you volunteer at an animal shelter back home? There is quite likely another shelter that could use a hand and would be grateful for someone with experience. You can meet like-minded volunteers or like-minded people who utilize the place you're volunteering.

(Prompt by Betsy Rubin)

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