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Nuns in Vegas

Sisters Helen and Linda had devised a devilish plan. Now, they knew that, as nuns, they really shouldn't be devising devilish plans, but they wanted just one weekend of craziness. They had both joined the order when they were eighteen and had never had one of those wild nights that you'd end up saying you regret but really just be very fondly proud of.

They knew that they needed funding and so they found a way to slowly siphon off a lot of money from the school they were working at. Now, they made sure that it was never so much that the kids or teachers were going without, but there were a few budget talks that had the Sisters sweating.

But the day had finally come. Sisters Helen and Linda were going to Vegas. They rented a hot red convertible and let the wind take their habits' cowls off into the wind. They screamed, "Vegas!" as they crossed into the city because it's what they felt like they should do.

They got a few looks when they checked into the hotel, but two nuns in only part of their uniforms was far from the strangest thing going on in Vegas, so they didn't attract too much attention.

"What should we do first?" asked Sister Helen. She had grown up in a small town before joining the order so she wasn't really sure what a wild night entailed.

"Let's get drinks," giggled Sister Linda. Linda had grown up in a big city, so she had at least seen some of the hi-jinks that people got up to on nights out and it always seemed to start with drinks.

Sisters Helen and Linda went to the hotel bar and looked for a long time at the list of cocktails.

"Do you think getting a Bloody Mary would be a sin?" whispered Sister Helen. She wasn't sure if the cocktail was referencing the Mary of the Bible, but it felt wrong.

"I think it's a bit too late to worry about sins, Sister Helen."

The two giggled and Helen ordered a Bloody Mary while Linda ordered a Long Island Iced Tea. Linda knew she liked tea, so she figured it was a good cocktail to start with.

After several rounds of cocktails, the Sisters had started to loudly complain about how hot their habits were.

"Sh-should we get different dresses?" slurred Sister Helen who had had far too many Bloody Marys.

"We got the money!" shouted Sister Linda, who thought she was whispering.

The two stumbled into the nearest store and came out with sequined black dresses. They had decided that they were still nuns after all, so they should stay in their color scheme.

"Let's go to a strip show!" shouted the now glittering Sister Linda.

Sister Helen was too lost staring at the lights of the strip and started to just wander towards them.

But Sister Linda grabbed her arm, "Come oooon, Sister Helen. I wanna see the dancers!"

After managing to hail a cab, the two ended up at what the driver told them was the best gentlemen's club in Vegas. They flashed their cash at the bouncer and got a table as close to the stage as possible.

Music with a strong beat came on and scantily clad women strutted their way to poles before beginning their acrobatic routines.

"Shake what the good lord gave you!" catcalled Sister Linda.

When one of the women crawled like a sexy cat towards them, Sister Helen went bug-eyed. "God is good," she whispered reverently before putting a $50 bill down the woman's top. The woman winked at her before getting up and spinning around the pole again.

After having all they could handle of the strippers, Sisters Helen and Linda decided it was time to gamble. They knew this was something that happened in Vegas and they thought their trip wouldn't be complete without it.

They decided to try their hands at poker, but when they quickly realized that they had had too many drinks to play, they switched to the slot machines.

When they were down to their last set of quarter, Sister Linda said, "Let us pray." And the two Sisters bowed their heads in prayer and then put their last quarter into the machine. Suddenly all of the lights went off and a loud voice came over the speakers, "JACKPOT!"

The Sisters laughed, looked at each other, and said, "God is good!"

(Prompt by Jacqui Broderick)

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