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Mortal act of sleeping

"I refuse to participate in such mortal acts such as sleeping"

"Okay, but when you get sleep recommended to you--"

"I don't care that he recommended it, it's beneath us gods."

"But you haven't been feeling well and we went to the--"

"Gods have always had their own ways of solving these things. If we needed doctors, we wouldn't be gods."

"Okay, but maybe we have god doctors for a reason. It's okay to admit that you need some help."

"GODS DON'T NEED HELP!"

"Calm down! I know you've been irritable lately, but don't take it out on me."

"You're right, I'm sorry my sweet, but I just think god doctors are a crazy new age fad that will fade with time."

"But why? Maybe they have some wisdom to impart. After all, humans have been sleeping for millennia--"

"Humans have been doing a lot of things for millennia."

"Fair point, but other species sleep too."

"Mortal species."

"What's wrong with trying something that mortals use?"

"We are supposed to be superior to them."

"But we do other things that mortals do. Why not this?"

"What things do we do that mortals do?"

"Almost everything! We eat, we talk, we have sex--"

"All of those things are enjoyable and not a waste of time."

"Maybe sleep is enjoyable."

"It's a waste of time! You just lie there for hours."

"So what? We're immortal, we can afford to waste some time."

"We're immortal so we shouldn't have to waste time. We are supposed to be better than any petty mortal vices."

"Well that's clearly not true."

"What do you mean?"

"You're acting like we gods don't do stupid shit like start wars over who is the prettiest or don't give in to vices like wine or beautiful mortals."

"Beautiful mortals can be quite fun..."

"Do you think they're fun but have no solid ideas to offer us gods?"

"Yes."

"Ah but you just said they're fun. Thus they at least have to ideas about what is fun."

"You know that's not what I meant."

"I'm just trying to point out to you that you clearly already accept that mortals have some good ideas."

"But you know that's not what I meant."

"What if sleep is fun, don't you want to try it just once?"

"What could possibly be fun about it?"

"Well the god doctor--"

"The quack."

"The god doctor said it could help you take time to get your thoughts in order. Letting yourself rest could allow you to build up strength for anything that is to come."

"And where is the fun in that?"

"Well he also said that you might dream."

"Dreaming also seems like a waste of time."

"But doesn't it sound like it could be fun? Mortals seem to enjoy it."

"Mortals enjoy it because there are things that are impossible for them and dreaming allows them to experience the impossible. We are gods, nothing is impossible."

"Apparently getting you to try something new is impossible."

"Don't be like that."

"Me? You're the one being so difficult. I just want you to feel better and so I had the wild idea that maybe, even if it is just a new age fad, you could try going to a doctor and--"

"I did go! Doesn't that show I'm open to new things?"

"You went but pouted like a mortal baby the whole time and wouldn't even take a suggestion that could in no way hurt you. I swear, you're impossible."

"As a god, being impossible seems quite in line with our branding."

"You know what I meant."

"Hey you're the one who earlier got to twist my words into being something other than what I meant."

"To help you! Please just try sleeping."

"Why try something so mortal that I know won't work?"

"But maybe it will work or maybe you'll at least enjoy it."

"Would you try something so beneath you?"

"Lying down in a dark room for a while? Sure, I would try it. We have infinity to live, why not spend some of it trying out new things?"

"Just because something is new doesn't mean it should be tried. Remember when we gods took turns creating animals?"

"Admittedly the angler fish was a mistake."

"See?"

"But this doesn't involve anyone besides you, please just try it."

"But it's so..."

"So what?"

"Mortal."

"I give up. We're going in circles. Go be miserable for the rest of your eternal life."

"Better that than do something mortal like sleep."

(Prompt by Katie Durr)

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