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Dumb color names

Okay so I'm well enough to actually write for 15 minutes, but it's still going to be a list. Elena shared with me a list of terrible color names she's actually seen products be described, so here are ones that I've just come up with (all welcome to use as long as I get some money for my efforts).

  1. Rusted bicycle chain
  2. Jam-covered child
  3. Obese leopard
  4. Masticated strawberry
  5. Overripe banana
  6. Chickenpox
  7. Garbage slime
  8. Pencil shavings
  9. Goopy diaper
  10. Itchy cardigan
  11. Used car salesman
  12. Dustbunny in a spiderweb
  13. Offensive graffiti
  14. Infected piercing
  15. Ingrown nail
  16. Mildewy drywall
  17. Soap scum 
  18. Aching stegosaurus
  19. Cramped jungle cat
  20. Red blue raspberry
  21. Translucent car
  22. Shimmer gunk
  23. Shiny battery
  24. Used tissue
  25. Crumpled shirt
  26. Messy tangerine
  27. Turquoise toenail
  28. Got fired red
  29. Squirrel-eaten pumpkin
  30. Should've washed that sooner
  31. Caked on grease
  32. Crumb filled blanket
  33. Radioactive boll weevil
  34. Depressed termite
  35. Cheery earwig
  36. Cockroach glisten
  37. Sweat stain
  38. Dewy eyeball
  39. Allergic reaction
  40. Greasy veggie burger
  41. Sticky bar floor
  42. Ruptured eardrum
  43. Smooth dandruff
  44. Snake oil puce
  45. Worm infested apple
  46. Snake infested well
  47. Even boiling water won't clean this
  48. Clean up on aisle 12
  49. Sleek mouse
  50. Fluffy rat
  51. Expiration date
  52. Wilted herb
  53. Gangrene 
  54. Black bile
  55. Yellow bile
  56. Brown phlegm
  57. Migraine pink
  58. Cracked knuckles
  59. Forever stained
  60. Mothball chic
  61. Grubby grubs
  62. Slurping spaghetti
  63. Oil and water
  64. Bleached tar
  65. Tarred and canary feathered
  66. Blow your nose
  67. Gravelly coffee
  68. Milkshake dregs
  69. Moldy library book
  70. Sensuous celery
  71. Graphic blueberry
  72. Violent avocado
  73. Sleeping honey dew
  74. Spotted eggplant
  75. Sharp egg
Let me know real dumb colors you've seen in person! I'm always amused to hear them. The worst I've seen in real life is melted chihuahua (it was some kind of makeup).


(Prompt by Elena Westbrook)

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