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Thoughts on 90 Day Fiancé: The Last Resort season 3, episode 1

Season premiere!

  1. I am excited that this time we're in a castle (which I sorta hope is haunted)
  2. Oop it looks like Shekinah pulls a "Go back to your country"
  3. Is this show going to be like The Traitors (that's what the opening credits are giving)
  4. Was that caution tape in Russ and Paola's home?
  5. Did the couples not know they were going to a castle?
  6. Sorry, receptionist, but you are giving me HAUNTED vibes
  7. Sarper goes on a whole face journey 
  8. Also, lol them putting Sarper and Shekinah into the Lady Jane Grey room because the receptionist says that Lady Jane Grey was the only woman Henry VIII ever loved which is definitely the producers hinting at the fact that Shekinah is the only woman Sarper has ever loved. HOWEVER, being the nerd I am, I know that Lady Jane Grey and Queen Jane Seymour ARE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE
  9. Jenny...did you think a king and queen would be living in the castle while this show was being filmed?
  10. Wait, why are Russ and Paola living in an RV?
  11. Okay, are all of the rooms named for one of King Henry VIII's wives?
  12. Also, yep, we're gonna do ghosty shit on this show
  13. Wait...do the couples actually put credit cards down for this?
  14. Wow. Paola is like, "Seeing a ghost would be so cool and fun!" and Russ is like, "I'm here to actually fix things"
  15. Russ, you said you hate "the d word" and then you just casually said "divorce"
  16. Ah, Pao, you will have to tell Russ you've seen a lawyer now because you did just say it on camera
  17. Um. So, yes, production did mean for Kara and Guillermo to put these outfits on, but is roleplaying as King Henry VIII and one of his wives really someone's fantasy?
  18. I do like thinking that King Henry VIII would be appalled by all of this though, so that's nice
  19. "Lady of the Streets" is a BURN, Guillermo
  20. And then Kara calls him "Lord of the Dicks" so we're off to a good start
  21. I forgot that Rebecca had been married three times before Zied
  22. Ho boy, Zied might have a list
  23. Wait, where is this footage of Rebecca "catching Zied with a blonde" from?
  24. Also, from the footage, it didn't look like Rebecca caught Zied doing anything romantic with the blonde lady
  25. Thais and Patrick do seem to agree on the castle metaphor, but it doesn't work for me
  26. Uhhh...Patrick...I do not like men telling women how they can dress
  27. Guillermo, I can believe that Kara is sending mixed signals at times, but she is allowed to want to sleep with you one night and not be in the mood the next
  28. Hey, Jenny, you know we're here, right?
  29. Shekinah, can you really not say the name "Guillermo"?
  30. Aw Hell yeah, we are bringing up Sarper's standup
  31. Rebecca, I also don't like it when you tell Zied how he has to style his outfit
  32. Are they going to make the couples walk to this pub? (Nevermind, a car does show up)
  33. Russ...men can show off their chests
  34. SHEKINAH! YOU ARE NOT IN IRELAND! AND IRELAND AND ENGLAND ARE NOT THE SAME!
  35. Why did we only watch Russ, Paola, Shekinah, and Sarper drive to the pub?
  36. PATRICK! YOU CAN'T SAY THAT!
  37. Aw a cute doggo
  38. Ah so Shekinah has a plan to bug Thais
  39. Sarper...SIGH...age gaps can be problematic regardless of the gender of the older one
  40. Sumit is shorter than I realized
  41. I do love that Shekinah is a Jenny fangirl
  42. Sarper, you're mad about Patrick talking about your ears?
  43. Jenny, you have to find a way to talk to Sumit about this that isn't like a scolding mother
  44. Shekinah, if Thais was a suggested person to follow...doesn't that mean you unfollowed her too?
  45. Shekinah...maybe don't specify that Sarper swearing in Turkish is the ugliest thing
  46. Yikes, Sarper just said Shekinah is his punishment
  47. These therapists are all hot
  48. Okay, an unexplained $2,000 is a lot, Thais
  49. Oop Shekinah saying Patrick could only pull someone as hot as Thais cause she was in another country
  50. Ah Thais got lipo
  51. Oof, Russ and Paola might just be done...this is cold
  52. Yikes now we're talking about gender roles and being "alpha"
  53. This season the couples go rock climbing
  54. This season there is a skeleton (I looked away and missed the context)
  55. This season there is a sex dungeon
  56. This season Sumit learns what kinky means
  57. This season Patrick's brother John comes to the castle because of course he does
  58. This season we talk about lots of lies
  59. This season we will once again have the recommitment ceremony
  60. Can't wait for more!

(Prompt by me)

90 Day Fiancé: The Last Resort, TLC

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