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Obadiah: Cool Cat

Obadiah thought he was one cool cat. He thought he was just the talk of the town, the big cheese, the king of his castle. And how could he not be? he thought, Obadiah was the coolest name around. Only the best names are given to Marvel villains, right? Certainly villains never get dumb names that connote lameness. And if a name was so old it was in the Bible, then certainly it just had to be the spiffiest name. Only posh and hip names come from old texts. Obadiah thought the name conveyed his strength and stealth and so he strutted around proudly with the name.

Luckily, being a cat, he would never understand that his owners had named him that because he was quite the opposite. Obadiah was an elderly cat and was actually weak and a bit pathetic looking. It was clear that he had once been a vibrant orange tabby, but now his color was faded and something had happened to his fur that made it grow in odd patches. Obadiah clearly thought that this made him look scrappy and tough, but really it made him look like a creature that was in desperate need of a hug. His owners, Opal and Oscar, didn't mind though, they thought it made him adorable.

He was also not nearly as stealthy as he thought. Admittedly some of this was due to the fact that Opal and Oscar's house was old (somehow it felt even older than the name Obadiah) and thus the floor creaked, giving away Obadiah's position. But even when he was let outdoors, he could only manage to be conspicuous. He would let out a small meow any time he encountered something new, and with his already failing memory, this was quite often. He also only seemed to manage to move in big clumsy movements, clearly the graceful nature of his youth was far behind him. But Obadiah didn't seem to notice and was always quite proud when he appeared in Opal or Oscar's lap, thinking he had just performed a feat of near magic-like ninjaness. Oscar and Opal would just smile when he half pounced, half fell into their laps, and scratch his head to show him he was loved.

When they had adopted Obadiah, it was because he just looked so sad that they couldn't imagine leaving such a poor creature behind. He gazed up at them with his big, grey eyes and practically begged them to pick him up and take him home. He'd been found on the street, so he didn't have a name yet which let Oscar and Opal think of a name for him. They passed by any typical names for a cat like Fluffy (for clearly his fluffy was sparse at best) and they passed up the name they'd been holding onto for a pet cat, Simba, because it connoted a regality, beauty, and strength that this poor cat simply did not have. After much debate, they decided to go with Obadiah because they thought it immediately conveyed an old creature in need of some love and care. Opal and Oscar were only too happy to provide Obadiah with love and care, they had wanted a cat for some time and were pleased that they could rescue one that was in such need of rescuing.

Obadiah clearly thought he had the run of the house. After all, Opal and Oscar did take care of him, so didn't that mean he was the house's supreme being? They fed him, washed him, carried him to bed, and even cleaned up his poop. Obadiah thought himself the ruler of this home. Opal and Oscar didn't mind doing so much for him, they carried him around because once he had been climbing up the railing and had taken a very bad tumble onto their piano. That run to the vet was enough to scare them into over pampering Obadiah. He was their little old man, they told each other and they would make sure he could live the rest of his life in love and comfort.

In the end, it didn't matter if Obadiah thought of himself as one cool cat, it didn't really do Opal or Oscar any harm, they actually found it rather amusing. But just so any reader is clear, Obadiah was far from a cool cat.

(Prompt by Ruairi Kennedy)

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