Since I'm on the apps (Hinge and Match to be specific), I guess I spend a fair amount of time thinking about this, but I still think this post will help me think some things out.
Firstly, my ideal romantic relationship would be supportive. With everything going on with my dad I often wish I had a partner to support me in it. That doesn't mean that I don't have a great support system as is--I do and I'm very grateful for it--but it would be so nice to have someone to visit my dad with, someone to share my daily stress about it with, and someone to help me keep it together sometimes. I would also just appreciate support with day to day things sometimes like walking Hoban or cooking dinner. Doing those things alone can make me feel lonely so I often call people during them or play a podcast or audiobook. I, of course, also have minor frustrations that I would like support in and just have someone to listen to every little thing. I, of course again, would return all of this support in kind, as I think it should be.
Along with support comes kindness. Even if I have to be brought back to reality for something, I need that approach to be with kindness as I can be a bit sensitive, especially when dealing with hard topics.
Humor would also have to come into the relationship. I need someone who laughs at my jokes and who makes me laugh at theirs. Humor is needed in both light and dark times, so I would look for this in an ideal relationship.
I also want romance. Now this doesn't mean constant big romantic gestures--in fact, I think I would actually get tired of that and/or feel too much pressure from them if they were frequent (but a few times especially at a proposal would be nice). For me, romantic gestures are just showing that you're thinking of me. Like getting me flowers (a classic for a reason) or snapping a photo of something that made them think of me or offering to help with mundane things or just helping when they see a small problem (like moving a hot kettle away from me after I almost burn my hand). Really little things I can find very romantic.
Another thing is I want someone whose intellectualism clicks with mine. This doesn't mean that they have to be more or even the same level of intellectual that I am. It just means that I want to be able to share intellectual discussions and hobbies with them at times (like doing a crossword together). I also wouldn't be a great fit for someone who is super intellectual as I definitely have a basic side that needs to be seen and appreciated as well (I'm watching The Bachelorette tonight and I watch The Real Housewives and 90 Day Fiance as you know if you read this blog), even if it isn't fully understood. But I find intelligence and intellectualism (different things), attractive and I think I have those traits too so I want to be able to share that.
Some other general things I'm looking for: someone whose politics click with mine, a feminist, someone who wants kids, someone with a job that means something to them (or has a hobby that means something to them), someone who finds me physically attractive (believe me, a tough thing to find based on how people respond to selections on Match.com), someone whom I find physically attractive (not sure I really have a type though so this is pretty open), and I'm sure other things that aren't coming to me right now.
Boy, I feel like that was all pretty generic, but still. Know anybody who fits, send 'em my way (apps are Hell on Earth--ask to see my "Men are Trash" Google Photos album if you need proof)!
So, what does your ideal romantic relationship look like? Has that changed over time? Have you found it?
(Prompt provided by Amelia Sacco)
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